Sublime Domination

Sportspeople and teams who have lorded it statistically over the opposition

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Maria Sharapova is statistically the most dominant woman ever to reach the semi-final of a Grand Slam.  In progressing like a shouty steamroller to the semis in Melbourne, she won 60 games and lost just nine in her five matches.  So, on average, she was winning her sets by 6 games to 0.9.  (Up to the semis, she hadn’t serve-volleyed once, though, the scaredy-cat).

If you love sport and, like me, dwell on the nerdy side of the bleachers, you’ll love a good stat.  Particularly one that highlights the complete dominance of a team, competitor or performance.  Have a look at this lot, world beaters and statistical freaks all.

Phil Taylor

The late, lamented Sid Waddell called The Power “the greatest sportsman this country’s ever produced.”  Leaving aside the argument about whether or not darts is a sport (it is, by the way, but we can decide that I’m right another day), it’s hard to quibble with Waddell’s assessment.

Taylor recently captured his sixteenth world championship crown.  Nobody else has more than five.  These sixteen titles have come from a total of nineteen finals; only Dennis Priestley, John Part and Raymond van Barneveld have managed to defeat the great man at the last.  In world semi-finals, his record reads 19/19.  That’s right.  Unlike a teenaged boy whose mother bursts into his bedroom, Taylor has never lost a semi.

Consider, too, his consistent high scoring.  Michael van Gerwen, the Dutch wunderkind whom Taylor defeated in this year’s final, last year broke the record for a three-dart average in a televised match, with a quite astounding 121.86.  However, prior to that, Taylor held the top ten highest averages.  He has nine televised nine-darters (van Barneveld is next on the list with five).  I’d also be amazed if he didn’t hold the record for the number of 100+ finishes and the regularity with which he hits his cover shot of treble nineteen – perhaps someone out there can confirm…

Somebody cleverer than me should invent a statistical analysis whereby top performers from different sports can be compared to one another.  A Champions’ Champions Index.  Factors would include: dominance versus other competitors; longevity of achievement; number of awards/accolades/titles; historical standing; and consistency.  I’d be willing to bet that Phil Taylor would emerge victorious on such an index, even against Sir Donald Bradman.

AP McCoy

One measure by which Phil Taylor would lose out is the number of times he’s been champion.  Anthony Peter McCoy – Tony or, more commonly, AP to the racing fraternity – has been champion Jump jockey for seventeen consecutive years.

For those not familiar with racing, this means he’s ridden more winners than any other jockey in each of the last seventeen National Hunt seasons.  Next on the list is Peter Scudamore with eight championships.  Unsurprisingly during that time, McCoy has smashed records left, right and centre.  He’s closing in on 4,000 career wins, with his nearest pursuer on about two-and-a-half thousand.  In 2001/2, he rode an incredible 289 winners, beating the record for Flat or Jumps that had been held by the legendary Gordon Richards since 1947.

But, as ever with statistics, the numbers only tell you the headline story.  ‘Will to win’ is an oft-used phrase in sport.  Well, McCoy’s is cast iron, as his body seems to be.  On 12^th January 2008, he fell at Warwick, fracturing one vertebra and shattering two others.  One possible treatment was to wear a body cast for three months.  That would’ve meant missing the Cheltenham Festival so McCoy opted instead for an operation to insert metal strips into his back and an intense course of cryotherapy; on the final day of his treatment, he endured temperatures of -150 degrees Celsius (breaking the previous ‘record’ of -145) and giving himself frostbite all over his body, “including the tender bits.”  His remarkable comeback was completed when he partnered Albertas Run to victory in the Royal & SunAlliance Chase at the Festival.  It was March 13^th.  Naturally, despite his two-month absence, he still won the jockeys’ title that year.

Spare a thought for Richard Johnson.  In fourteen of McCoy’s winning seasons, Johnson has finished second in the championship; he also holds second place on the all-time winners list without ever being the champ.

Miami Dolphins – the perfect season

“That record will never be broken,” commentators and observers occasionally say.  It’s nonsense, of course, because the nature of sport and human development means that constant improvement is always the most likely trend over the long term.

Which is probably why, legend has it, the surviving members of Don Shula’s 1972 Miami Dolphins team get together to share a toast as soon as the last unblemished record falls each season.  They know their 17-0 (seventeen-and-o) season will be matched one day but, until then, they can bask in the glory of being the only ‘perfect’ team in NFL history.

Puts Arsenal’s ‘Invincibles’ of 2003/4 to shame, doesn’t it?  With 12 draws, the Gunners failed to win about one-third of their games.

Kim Jong-Il

Not just one of the top dictators to walk the planet but, by a distance, the best golfer there’s ever been.  According to North Korean media, the diminutive despot shot a round of 34 (38 under par), including 11 holes-in-one.  And who are we to question the North Korean media?

One point, though.  On the seven holes where he didn’t get an ace, he took 23 strokes.  Plenty of room for improvement there, Kim.  Your being dead surely won’t stop you.

Frank Lampard’s shunning by Chelsea and other cases of sporting ‘disloyalty’

Poor old Frank Lampard.  Actually, not poor.  Not by a long chalk.  Not that old either.  But old enough for Chelsea to decide, according to Lampard’s agent, not to offer the England midfielder a new contract ‘under any circumstances’ at the end of this season.

It’s a move that’s been criticised by some as a display of disloyalty on the part the club.  I think we’ve got to be careful how we use words like ‘loyalty’ in the context of professional sport.  In much the same way as ‘loyalty card’ is a complete misnomer – it should be ‘bribery voucher’ or some such – notions of loyalty between club and player can only be viewed in relation to the contractual agreement between the two parties.

Sensibly for Chelsea, but unfortunately for Lampard who’s been a great ‘servant’ (now that really is the wrong choice of word), the club are not willing to keep him on the books on improved terms versus his current contract.  Why would they?  In business terms, he’s an asset whose value diminishes over time; no company in its right mind would pay more now than five years ago when he was worth a lot more.

If Lampard winds up at Manchester United, and neither the club nor the fans could complain if he did, that would fire up the disloyalty debate all over again.

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Kieren Fallon switches horses mid-stream

Kieren Fallon has said in the past that he prefers the company of horses to that of many humans.  Certainly, when the six-time champion jockey whispers sweet nothings in the pricked ears of his mounts on the course or the gallops, his words can’t get him into trouble.  When he does interact with people, he attracts controversy as a sweating thoroughbred draws horse flies on a summer’s day.  He’s been banned from racing for drug offences, beating Signor Dettori to that punch by several years.  In 2004, he was the subject of a tabloid sting on race fixing, an offence of which he was later found not guilty at the Old Bailey.

But perhaps the most bizarre row in which Fallon has found himself embroiled came before the Epsom Derby in 2011.  He’d been booked to ride the Ed Dunlop-trained Native Khan, a likeable grey who had a live chance of springing a surprise in the big race.  Fallon had won on Native Khan both times he’d ridden the colt, most recently in the Craven Stakes, a decent Classic trial.  But then, in the week leading up to Epsom, he announced that he would instead be riding Recital, trained by the all-conquering Aidan O’Brien and winner of another Derby trial in Ireland.

This horse-switching is not uncommon, particularly among the top jockeys who are much in demand.  It must be frustrating for connections but that’s just the way it is, for example, where retained relationships take precedence over freelance arrangements.  So when Native Khan’s owner, Ibrahim Araci, threatened legal action to prevent Fallon from riding another horse in the Derby, my reaction was along the lines of: “selfish owner not used to not getting his own way and being vindictive.”

But then it emerged that Fallon had signed a contract.  He’d actually put pen to paper on an agreement to ride Native Khan for a year whenever asked and, if not asked, not to ride a rival in the same race.  Fallon had openly and deliberately reneged on both of these contractual promises.  The result: the court injunction was granted and Fallon was left without a ride in the Derby.

On the surface, these appear to be the arrogant actions of a man who believes the normal rules don’t apply to him.  My take, though, is that Fallon is just, to put it politely, a little naïve.  Either way, best stick to the horses, Kieren.

As a footnote, Native Khan finished fifth under replacement jockey Johnny Murtagh behind the French-trained winner, Pour Moi, with Recital, ridden by Pat Smullen, two lengths back in sixth.

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“Say it ain’t so, Joe”

Perhaps the strangest aspect of the most infamous case of sporting disloyalty in history is that it was never proven.  ‘Shoeless’ Joe Jackson and his seven Chicago White Sox team-mates accused of throwing the 1919 World Series for $5,000 apiece were acquitted of any wrong-doing.

However, the acquittal came in 1921 and the interim saw enough media muddying of the waters for the stain to become permanent.  On the one hand, there’s very little evidence that Jackson himself under-performed in the series to lend weight to the theory that he was party to a fix: statistics note that his batting average was the highest on either side (he also holds the third highest career average in history) and that he made no individual errors in the field.  On the other, newspaper reports carried purported quotes from the grand jury trial in which Jackson owns up to ‘crooked work’ in the field that ‘netted the Cincinnati [Reds] team several runs that they never would have had if we had been playing on the square.’  Important to note, though, that the official grand jury record makes no mention of the quote.

Even the most celebrated incident of the whole sorry affair – where a young, dewy-eyed fan is said to have pleaded “Say it ain’t so, Joe” as Jackson left the courtroom one day – is widely thought to be apocryphal.

If we’re to hold true to the notion of ‘innocent until proven guilty’, we must maintain that Jackson and his team-mates were clean.  I do hope so.  Say it wasn’t so, Joe.

Nevertheless, it’s a slur on sport made more shocking through the lens of history because it happened in supposedly more innocent times.  Well, whatever the truth, the 1919 World Series scandal and the American media’s reporting of it teach us this: there were never more innocent times.

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Next up: Lance Armstrong explaining his alleged betrayal of cycling on Oprah…

Where Did That Come From?

Sometimes, ordinary sportspeople and teams deliver extraordinary performances.

World darts champion elect, Michael van Gerwen, last night hit a magnificent nine-dart finish in his semi final against James Wade.  It’s always a special moment when you witness sporting perfection – a hole-in-one, a 147, a 300-point ten-pin bowling game – but in van Gerwen’s case, there was something inevitable about his achievement.  His trebling in this tournament has been nothing short of astonishing; in his previous match against reigning champ Adrian Lewis, van Gerwen nailed more treble twenties than singles (170-odd against 140-odd).  So, whilst still a huge thrill to watch, the nine-darter wasn’t the biggest surprise in the world.  Had he completed a second in the very next leg – eight perfect darts were followed by a double-twelve attempt that missed by a millimetre – that really would’ve been something.

This year’s tournament at the Alexandra Palace saw the return to the world stage of Paul Lim.  In 1990, Lim made history by becoming the first player to take out a nine-dart finish in what was then the Embassy World Championship.  Unlike van Gerwen’s, Lim’s feat came right out of the blue.  He had never been further than the second round of the Worlds and most of his tournament success was achieved in less competitive events in Asia.  He was, in short, a decent player at world level but no more than that.  If anyone were going to do it, it would surely be Bristow, Wilson or Lowe (the only man at the time to have a televised nine-darter to his name).  But here he was, this unassuming naturalised American, demonstrating a steady throwing arm and unerring accuracy, and prompting some bizarre commentary from Tony Green: “Yes.  Yes!!  Yes!!!” (on the second 180); then, after the final dart, the wonderfully circular: “Is he excited?  We are.  Is he happy?  We are.  And with fifty-two thousand pound [sic] in the bank, so is he.”

Lim faced a certain Michael van Gerwen in the first round this year.  He lost, of course, but not before taking out a maximum 170 finish.  Proof that he still has the capacity for perfection.

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David Lloyd 214 not out versus India

Dear old Bumble.  Without doubt one of the most eccentric, charismatic and amusing commentators there is.  One of his stock phrases is “Start the car!”, indicating that a match is nearing its climax.  A couple of years ago, when the World Cup was held on the Indian sub-continent, Lloyd adapted this to “Start the tuk tuk!”  I almost fell of the sofa laughing.  An absolute genius.

But even Lloyd himself might acknowledge that he was less of a superstar as a player.  His first-class batting average was 33, he bowled decent slow left-armers and he helped Lancashire to four Gillette Cups in the early-mid 70s.  A good, talented, whole-hearted cricketer, no doubt, but not a world beater.  Nevertheless, he was drafted in to the Test team in 1974 to replace the self-exiled Geoff Boycott as opener.  In just his second match, against India at Edgbaston, Lloyd made 214 not out as England racked up 459/2 declared.

A Test match double hundred is a rare treasure.  By way of illustration, and to take a period of time not quite at random, it’s worth noting that between June 1930 and February 1933, only six doubles were scored in all Test cricket.  All of them by Don Bradman.  For Lloyd to add his name to the ranks of Test double-centurions, then, was a noteworthy achievement.

Sadly for Lloyd, he had a torrid time at the hands of Lillee and Thompson on the following winter’s Ashes tour.  He was injured, came home and never played another Test match.  His Test career spanned nine matches over seven months.  Years later, the peerless John Arlott wrote that Lloyd had been ‘effectively shocked and shattered out of Test cricket.’

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Coventry City 1987 FA Cup

Coventry were 70/1 with the bookmakers to lift the 1987 FA Cup.  I know this because a few years later I met a chap called Bernard who would have a tenner on them every year.  The £700 he trousered that year will, I’m guessing, just about allow him to break even over his lifetime.

Sorry, Tottenham fans, but everyone apart from you lot was cheering on the Sky Blues on 16 May 1987.  It was classic FA Cup.  The footballing aristocrats from North London versus the blue-collars from the industrial West Midlands.  How could the Lilywhites, boasting such talents as Hoddle, Waddle and Ardiles, be upstaged by the likes of Lloyd McGrath, Greg Downs and Micky Gynn?  [Clearly what swayed it for Coventry was having future Ipswich playmaker Steve Sedgley on the bench.]  This was Tottenham Hotspur, for God’s sake, bidding for an eighth FA Cup success.  The club had never lost in the final.

Having fallen behind to the prolific Clive Allen’s early goal – his 49^th of the season – Coventry twice came from behind to level the score at 2-2 after 90 minutes.  Their second equaliser, Keith Houchen’s flying header, is one of the most famous goals in Wembley history and earned the player that season’s BBC Goal Of The Season award.  In extra time, the footballing gods decreed that Gary Mabbutt should be the fall guy of the piece and it was his unfortunate own goal that handed the redoubtable Sky Blues victory.  Captain Brian ‘Killer’ Kilcline’s primal roar as he lifts the trophy is an enduring image.  As for Mabbutt, well, he too is immortalised in the Coventry fanzine GMK – Gary Mabbutt’s Knee.

The 1987 FA Cup remains Coventry’s only major trophy in their 93-year history.